Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Too Busy

Dear Abigail,

Your mother and father are too busy. We have made too many commitments to other people and you are getting the short end of the stick. When both of your grandmothers on the same day tell me that we have too much other stuff going on, I must evaluate. When you are in tears and unable to give enough loves and smooches to Daddy as he leaves the house, I know something is amiss.

I thought it funny when I was relieved of my Children's ministry duties for almost a year. I thought I would take just the six weeks required by my doctor to recover from Simon's birth. I forgot what infanthood requires of mothers. You at three are so very independent, more sometimes than you should be, but Simon at three weeks old is anything but independent requiring me to constantly adjust, requiring you to wait far more than you ever have. And as we go through this transition, creating a new normal for all of us, you need me and you need your dad with lots of loves and smooches.

I am sorry that you have been shuffled by busyness. I can't, nor would I, apologize for the changes Simon has brought. He is a gift from God and the struggles he presents now are for our refining--yours, mine, Daddy's--and the character created in the refining process is a reward from God. But for the commitments we have made outside our family that are drawing us apart as a family and leaving you distressed by our absence, I am sorry.

Today, I will look at how to cut some of those things out.

I love you,
Mommy

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