Saturday, February 9, 2008

Ice Cream Epiphany

So this weekend we were invited to our neighbor's daughters' birthday party. One girl turned 12 the other 2. Abigail and their little one play together and we enjoy the time we have spent with our friends. We were looking forward to the party and Abigail couldn't stop thinking about it since we got her friend a gift. We have on occasion met various members of their extended family and knew they lived in this neighborhood for a long time.

The party was at a bowling alley in the next town. It was a fun drive in a direction we had yet to take. When we got to the party, I quickly realized that I didn't know many people at all and everyone else knew each other. I don't like situations like that when I am reminded that I am an outsider wanting to be an insider. I realize that I am far more like the teenager I thought I had left behind than I like to admit.

Anyway, what did I do? I offer to help. My answer to any situation where I feel uncomfortable. Offer to help. That way I don't have to try to engage others in conversation; I'm too busy being helpful. Until I was scooping ice cream to accompany the cake, I didn't know why I always offer. I am worth attending, worth the invitation when I am helping and, of course, it is a way to hide from others. (I have a new compassion for men asking women on a date--always the risk of being rejected. It takes a toll.)

Sitting here writing I am reminded that though a heart of service is high on God's priority list, it is a heart delighting in serving others, not in using a virtue to escape relationship with others and find our worth apart from Him. For God's call is first to "Come." and find yourself in Him. Then the call is to "Go." and invite others to "Come."

What about you? Did anyone have their own epiphanies this weekend? What have you learned about yourself or the Lord or yourself and the Lord recently?

3 comments:

  1. In situations like those, I usually sit alone wanting someone to come talk with me but at the same time wishing that no one would see me sitting alone. I like your approach much better (although that wasn't your point).

    So, what I have learned lately?? Well, I was struggling last week as I visited with Karen. I was wishing myself back in St. Joe, wishing I could be surrounded by great friends again and live in our fabulous house in that neat little town. BUT I don't live there anymore and the Lord rarely calls one back to where they've been. So, as I sat in the park with Karen, I realized that I need to embrace my new life here and enjoy the friendships that the Lord brings my way (oh, and that I need to step out of the Holly tree and make some friends) :)

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  2. I totally understand what you were saying about missing St. Joe. Me too! And as you were visiting with Karen, I was envying you visiting with Karen. Alas! Well, out of the holly bush for both of us! (I'm glad I'm not alone.)

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  3. Well, helping at parties is always good :) The mom usually appreciates it!
    I have lived here over a year and have yet to make one good friend. So look on the bright side, you have friends in your new town!
    But this weekend I didn't learn anything of value.
    I'm just praying a lot, trying to find my footing on a slippery slope, praying that God shows me where He wants me to be. And helps me raise the kids the best that I can without their daddy around. Which is much, much harder than I had ever anticipated. Maybe I'm expecting an angel to appear on my doorstep with a bucket and a mop, or hammer and nails, or maybe a good shoulder to cry on.
    And I feel just a tiny bit let down when I open that door to feel the cold wind on my face instead. Maybe I'm not opening the right door? I need to have more faith. Much, much more.

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